Category: Trauma
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General Thoughts About Moving Forward After Ex-Therapist
There were never any consistent “lessons” with Ex-T (ex-therapist)- I knew her basic beliefs about eating disorders, but that’s it. She mentioned the importance of what I tell myself about myself-and that the brain hangs on to all of that, but that was about the extent of it. I no…
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How I Was Breadcrumbed During Eating Disorder Therapy
Photo from miascucina.com I’m going to use the list in this article to go through specifics of how I was breadcrumbed… https://www.enotalone.com/article/relationships/10-alarming-breadcrumbing-signs-you-shouldnt-ignore-now-r16587/ 1. Inconsistent behavior.… at times, I heard from my ex-therapist regularly (especially early on, or when I’d tell her I was getting tired of doing therapy). Most of…
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Physical Impact of Toxic Therapy
The mind and body are so interconnected that it can be incredulous. I’ve had a lot of trauma in my life, and with that has come PTSD and the tendency to be in fight or flight most of the time. It’s a lot worse when something or someone triggers it.…
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So, Now What Am I Going To Do?
Image from general internet search. I’ve been actively restricting for nearly 4 years- the longest stretch ever with ‘numbers’ ruling everything. That doesn’t include the food restriction in my house as a kid when I was bribed to lose weight when I wasn’t fat, at ages 6-7. My head is…
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Choosing An Online Eating Disorder Therapist
Photo- mine. OK, first of all, if you can get professional “in person” help, please do. Things have come a long way in the 44 years I’ve been getting help on and off- from straight up psych hospitals, to inpatient treatment (medical and residential), and outpatient. Back then, if you…
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What To Look For In Therapy Going Wrong
I first had inklings of something not being OK nearly 3 years ago. Something wasn’t right, but I was the one who was seeking help for a messed up head, so what did I know? There was one other time when I didn’t listen to my gut, and it nearly…
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Figuring Out A New Normal After Toxic Eating Disorder Therapy
I can’t begin to explain how hard the whole food thing has gotten (again) with the mess left behind from therapy hell. I’m still working on it- and doing what I can. I don’t think she has any idea how her words- or more importantly the LACK of words- can…
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The Physical Torment of Eating Disorder Recovery
https://escapethechaosblog.wordpress.com/2024/07/18/the-physical-torment-of-eating-disorder-recovery/
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The Physical Torment of Eating Disorder “Recovery”
I’ve been at this for 2 years in my 6th decade of life, and it’s been hell. Some of that is from the gross ignorance of the medical field in regards to nutrition and assessing for eating disorders in someone who isn’t so thin they’re see-through. Some of that is…
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White-Knuckle Death Grip
Since things got worse during the week of Halloween when I had 4 appointments (a lot for me), with the resulting and ongoing increase in physical pain, eating got really bad. It hurt too much to cook (in a kitchen without a lot of space at the moment), and eating…
